DVD transcript
“The BOF TV” logo is shown, followed by the following message:
“Thank you for purchasing this anniversary DVD edition of the first season of the show, available for the first time in unabridged form! Enjoy audio commentary by the stars and creators of this classic telenovela!” Continue reading
Hello Masons!
Just recently the Messrs of atcn released a little tune where they were singing and playing their instruments (while dancing in the studio sunset) about an orange orangutan. Now, we’ve received feedback about why they did that. So I’m going to try and shine a light on that.
Int: The Crystal Palace, tickle chamber
PENELOPE is sitting at the lab table reading documents pertaining to marine biology, a bucket of multicoloured, gyrating tentacles by her side. She furrows her brow in contemplation of these difficult matters. LEO enters from the Yellow Gardens with a tray of new samples, which wriggle about sleepily. They have the build of large shrimp, but the texture of salmon and each has a beak, a horn and a pair of vestigal wings.
LEO
Latest haul from PROFESSOR SPECTRE. Do you have time to take a look at these?
Continue reading
Would you vote for…
Jesus Josefson, carpenter, triple-schizophrenic, freelance saviour and magical wizard
…this candidate, mr. Donald Trump? I have been following his political career closely, for I am the light and the glory. I would point out some things, blessed readers, that I have found interesting in my sacredness. First off, mr. Trump wishes to erect a wall to keep out the people of Mexico and to restrict entry into his fine country from people of the most unblessed Muslim faith. Now, you might think that these things are needlessly stringent, but here I disagree, for the meek shall inherit the earth. Continue reading
Hi there! I’m Ray Sawyer and I’m the lead political analyst for the Grand Lodge of Masons’ Political Commentary on the Political Commentary Bureau – PCPCB. On this blog I’ll post you challenging questions and mind-blowing analysis on present commentary on present political events!
Int: the Gastronomy Institute, seclusion chamber.
FRANK is in the room, alone. He is sitting in a special chair, his limp frame propped up by various wires and contraptions. The chair sits inside a complex, oval MEDICAL POD that monitors his existence. FRANK’s mind is connected to gastronomical devices through a tube sticking out of his brain stem. His hands are bandaged, his skin is pale, and his eyes are completely white. He sings-
FRANK
Ho hum, diddle and dumb –
Singing a soong in a hospital roongm –
Where is the future, where is the past? –
Have the vultures made off with my mystical staff? –
Staff in the sense of personnel, you see –
Not a magic cane that could delight you and me.
The unconventional convention of “interesting” thinking is upon us. The man with the mind of an ape, the hands of a child and the balls of a watermelon will take to the stage and announce just what is great, HUGE, awesome, terriffic, terrible, weak, Mexican, Muslim, and amazing.
To celebrate the upcoming and much anticipated convent of huge, best and incredible thinking, we will release an EP called The Orange Orangutan’s Revenge this thursday, the 21th. It shall be the first in a series of EPs, which will trickle out of us somewhat often, all with 5 songs and based on different ideas. This first one is a deep collaboration with DJ Bo Blaze, the most artistic and rigorous DJ in all of the European mainland.
This record isn’t about Donald Trump, not really. It’s about the zeitgeist, it’s about the second wind of demagoguery, it’s about being here in the world right now, in the current time, in a corner of society. Join us and count down from five. Join the Deathlist.
Int: the Intensifying Hearts Club & Leisure Centre, in the women’s bathroom.
The women of the town – SALINA the rooster, MARCIA the mental case, MONICA the lovestruck fool, PENELOPE the betrayed lover, MADAME MORGANNA the matriarch, EDITOR the complainer, and a number of unnamed ones – are gathered in the bathroom. All of the women except for MADAME MORGANNA are in full histrionic meltdown.
PENELOPE
A new girl? A new girl in our town?
MONICA
That’s right. A beautiful one, too.
PENELOPE
PAULETTE…. Her name is.. PAULETTE!!?
MONICA
It is, I’m afraid. She is PAULETTE, the new girl who just arrived to our town a few hours ago.
Masons,
Fresh from the presses! Here comes a brand new poll straight from the gut of the Grand Lodge of Truth: The Brexit! The Brexit – British conservative free-market politicians’ desire for Britain to exit a project shaped and very much lead by conservative free-market politicians in a referendum mostly working-class people wanting less free-market and conservatism voted in. Hilarious! In a delightfully fact-free kind of way. Continue reading
a truth called nothing 